I don't do relationships

11:30 PM missusmonroe 0 Comments

thrifted hat, thrifted chiffon tank, American Apparel pants

I hate discussing my life in relation to males on here because there hardly is one, for one, they aren't that significant to my life, two, and I just don't deem it blog worthy honestly. It's not a cute look, although this is sort of like on online diary...not so much. In this case though, I feel as though it will make me feel a lot better if I release some thoughts because they are taking up too much space in my mind. I realize how illogical some of my behavior was, many in the case of the past couple of months, but I still went through with things. I like to experience life for myself because I see it as though I am creating this story and what's a story without experiences? I do live through other people's mistakes, and people speak on how that's the smartest way all the time, but sometimes you just want to live to feel. I guess that's to explain these past couple of months. I've been exploring more into my story, of course careful to keep my heart at bay. I don't do relationships because I don't enjoy wasting my time, but I realize you can also waste your time by entertaining something that has no potential to grow. Mediocrity is what some people accept because they believe they deserve no better and even though I don't view myself in that light, I realize mediocrity has been in my presence and I did nothing to push it away. I get over things quickly and I don't dwell, but I seem to be marinating more than usual and I'm trying to discover why. I think I allowed myself to believe someone can truly be as honest with others as I am because I wanted it to be true. I've always been the person to enjoy spending time with herself and to believe if you don't know who you are then you shouldn't be involved with someone else. Well, I believe my main motivation was to learn more about myself and eggsactly what I want. I succeeded in this, but I can't help but think it was at a price. I'm just frothing at the mouth at this point but I just needed to get some concrete thoughts somewhere. Organize the madness in my brain right now. *whew!* I feel a lot better, wow. Renewed, all in time for the new month!

xxoo missusmonroe