The Dreamers

11:34 PM missusmonroe 0 Comments

4,000 people. 4,000 is the amount they sold-out on at Dreamville and the predicted amount they called would be present; this amount in itself gave me anxiety.

Last September when the original ticket purchasers were set to attend Dreamville Festival, a For Us By Us initiative curated by my baby father Jermaine Lamar Cole, it was canceled due to the crazy hurricane brewing on the South East. Thankfully enough it was rescheduled but I thoroughly believe in the rescheduling and wahala surrounding the storm, free advertising really, more attention to the festival was generated and prompted plethora of people to purchase for the reschedule date. As if they didn’t hear about the festival until all of the commotion, copy? Thus, April comes around and I hear it shall be 4,000 of us… well first I’m just concerned about how I was getting there *cue the drama!*

I was going through too much shit at the beginning of this year to be concerned about much other than what was literally going on right in front of me, including preparing for many festivities I’d already planned to take part in (Dreamville, She Gets Away, Broccoli City fest and etc.) I’d mentally planned the best times to purchase flights and organize the shit but bottom line is I didn’t get my life together until right around the time I was “supposed” to be confirming many, many, many of things. I missed the window of getting reasonable flights to Raleigh and I would be damned if I was going to spend over $300 for a one way flight that is usually less than a hundred. So, it was time to finesse.

The last time I took a bus to North Carolina was the first time I ever visited Greensboro and it was Junior year of college, I took Mariah in a tow and we jetted, wheeled, I want to say something like 11-12 hours away and it was not something I wanted to relive. Spending more time commuting than being where you commute? Not my life. However, it is apparently my life because here I wasyet again. I booked a bus ticket during the night so I could essentially wake up and be in Raleigh. Well. I missed the bus. Spoiler alert.

Tears of frustration and curses ensued as my stubborn ass asshole of an Uber driver caused my trip to go very left, very expeditiously. I take responsibility for the fact that I was already late but I cannot take on the fact that the train delays are getting ridiculous at this point and as are the egos of these Uber drivers. I really didn't know what to do as I was trying to think as quickly as possible. I knew the trains had been done for the night, especially traveling that far.. book another bus?

As I continued to curse out loud, the air filled with "are you kidding me"s the inters of net told me that other than the 10 PM bus I just missed literally by minutes, if the driver hadn't spent 8+ minutes arguing with me and had just denied my trip outright then I wouldn't have been in that mess, there was one more bus for the night. Leaving in exactly half an hour. All the way uptown... Are you kidding me.

After playing patty-cacke for the next few minutes, I immediately ordered another Uber, I attempted to secure the ticket only to be told it was sold out are you fucking kidding me, I canceled the ride, I refreshed the website and there, magically, was a seat... The world was playing a nasty game with me and I was not entertained. So now I order another car but see, after having almost as much difficulty finding it's pick-up location as with the first car, I finally get in in an actual mess, secure the bus ticket, and express how quickly we must humanly possible move. But I knew the reality. My new and sincerely understanding driver innocently asked if it were possible for the bus to wait for me? For 5.. 10.. maybe 15 minutes? I let out a sad and incredibly frustrated groan because I could not miss this but too. But he'd made it clear without making it clear we were not going to arrive at 10:30.

I really didn't know what to do, I could not miss this festival.. I just could not it didn't make sense to anymore. I'd come so far. I just started saying aloud Lord please allow this bus to be delayed. Please make this bus delayed... I was jolted out of my words when the driver slammed on his breaks as we rolled into more traffic. I let out another frustrated groan, I could not do this honestly. Suddenly I remembered how Amtrak has a trip updating system where you can track the train and vaguely remembered Greyhound had something of a similar stature. Google soon confirmed this and I quickly scrolled down to what I was 98% sure was my bus cause to be honest the shit was hella confusing. There was an asterik next to the time and upon closer inspection, it said an exact time could not be given at the moment.

Are you. Actually. Kidding. Me!

I slammed my phone down. That was that. I just sat back in the Uber at this point cause it just felt over. Okay then I refreshed the page on my phone because there had to be an answer, how could one be so in-between!

Refresh.

Refresh. I scrolled down again, the buses prior to this last one for the entire night had been stalled somehow. 10:30... Delayed.

I basically choked on my sigh cause when I tell you I'm sure I had been holding my breath for about 22 minutes.

The events that ensued happened relatively quickly, my driver was ecstatic and he actually got me there earlier than we'd predicted. I ran, almost skipped, to the Port of Authority and happily got in line, everyone else was not as happy though. It appeared that the earlier buses were still waiting on their delayed bus but hey, I was here. I was getting to Raleigh.

So I wasn't getting to Raleigh. We waited for nearly two hours until someone told us that "they didn't have a driver and did not know if one was coming.. but we could just wait until who knows when or get a refund" ... I was actually stunned. I asked if this trip was going to be fulfilled, were they going to get a driver? The ever so pleasant lady responded that she couldn't confirm nor deny. At this point my life was to put it simply, a joke.

In the next few moments people started going crazy: attitudes flared, people scurried off to find more information, find their refunds, find their sanity. Again I was not sure what to do. Soon after overhearing surrounding conversations I quickly realized I was not the only one whose destination was Dreamville. Who just wakes up and says I want to take an 11 hour bus to Raleigh of all places anyway? It was 4 others and myself, well there were 3 others a little ways away as well, but the core of us soon formed a small tribe and were all asking the question of what the hell was going on?

I pulled out my phone and said I was booking this damn plane ticket, I just could not deal. This day had been too anxiety ridden, from work to rushing off home to rush out and try and catch two buses? Response from the group was that I should just wait for more information, at this point though if a driver were to come right at that moment which wasn't going to happen, we wouldn't get to Raleigh until about noon, 1 PM... the festivities literally began at noon. Although I'd never planned to get there that early, I completely despise that feeling of missing out on something because of something you could have prevented; as in you gave yourself the lack of options, you yourself didn't decide to come later.

I booked the flight. AND I FELT GREAT. My relief must have been contagious because I ended up convincing everyone else and we literally had an entire crew actually headed to the Ville.

I never did see the crew again. After our night out trying to waste time before our flights, getting our refunds then pizza, we went separately in smaller groups to repack and off to the airport. So if I were to go into detail about everything of the festival we'd be here forever, but all in all the experience was a good one. Even though the trauma of getting there was bitter comedy in the end, I completely could've done without it and it might not have left me feeling like I was missing something from the festival in the end. I was also looking for people I was supposed to meet there literally the entire day, the irritating part was it was because there was literally no service. You couldn't communicate with anyone, it was crazy, as in you could essentially lose someone standing right next to you and just pray to bump into them at some point before it got dark.

The brightest side about the day was that my outfit actually came together in a timely manner, as in I wasn't ordering things last minute and going crazy trying to finesse because of shipping delays. The bodysuit you see here is actually the slingshot that was supposed to come for Broccoli City Fest last year, HAH, and I snagged these bottoms from Beacon's because I simply refused to order something and it didn't look right. I wasn't sure if these pants would make any sense with the slingshot but I knew I wanted a baggier bottom look and these pants were literally something like a size 20 I don't even know. Very large.
It wasn't until the nth minute that I packed this mesh top I bought for Bali because I knew the weather was going to be spotty and truly, I didn't feel like being the girl doing the most when it's not even blazing out and might rain. It didn't make sense. So I wanted something of a cover up without covering up.. I just happened to look across my messy ass apartment, let's talk about my de-compartmentalizing pls, and my eyes just landed on the top, I walked over and stuffed it into my bag and that was really that on the thought process.

Captured by coulstyle

A fashion photographer captured me while searching for my homies and I always find it so interesting what others have to say about my fits after analyzing it; it's so insightful when really I just wanted a slingshot lmao and I wanted baggy bottoms to show off the thong because I am Manny Santos, and I have yet to fully pull off a thong exposed look yet to date so I will continue trying, the mesh top came randomly because of weather reasons, and the red hair was clearly a phase I'm currently in. That's as deep as it went, a little slut with a sprinkle of classy per usual. It just always comes in different forms and always looks so good.
I'm grateful for all the festival goers who understand festival looks and go off of the fest vibe! It's really a thing. It's this nonjudgmental energy, fun, and creative. I met some amazing women who I truly just attracted because I do believe you are who you attract and I always just bump into these welcoming, light-hearted people and I'm forever grateful for that. One thing I can say about Dreamville that I noticed is that it really brought together a tribe of like-spirited people. The Dreamers. It was an extremely welcoming energy that filled that park. And with all of my strife leading up to, it made so much sense when I arrived. It made sense, the people I met leading up to as well while immersed. It was so much of a mess yet it truly made sense.

But this fit though!?

xxoo missusmonroe