Even those who know me moderately well may not be aware of my passion for some dance forms, but I am and have always been in love with ballet. I'm talking in deep, passionate, don't tell your mamma about that day-dream love (okay, well maybe not completely that). When I was younger, like many other girls, I wanted to be a ballerina but I was so sure of my potential, I bought a step-by-step book, can you imagine as if it were like making a egusi stew, and really thought I was going to teach myself the basics so when I went into a class I wouldn't be too shy of the target...but when the opportunity presented itself to go to ballet camp, I chose cheerleading camp like an imbecile. I suppose I didn't believe I needed ballet camp, ugh I was something else back then.

In any case, I've always wanted to see a ballet and for the past couple of years I've dreamt of getting all dolled up, putting on a faux fur, and heading off to see The Nutcracker. Now, I'm extremely independent and that's always been my thing; however, I knew I wanted to share this special little fantasy night with someone, preferably of the non mediocre bravado. So a few weeks ago a special guy did make this happen and I actually haven't stopped thanking him for it. At first, the show began slow and I was just praying I wouldn't end up disappointed but it quickly picked up pace, we had some entertainment by a woman who must've believed she was the ringleader within the art of clapping (with your hands..not ass cheeks), the girls brought out their pointe shoes (most excited about), we had a bit too much of that unoaked drank, ending was fantastic.. we were just really living. Seriously one of the best nights.

P.S. shoutout to the waitress who couldn't get enough of my hair, complimented me on my gap, and told me I was a goddess. She was really digging my whole essence and I appreciate her, thank you queen! I hope everyone had a merry Christmas.

xxoo missusmonroe

Here I go again, just randomly "showin' up" as I please, one with the wind is what y'all must really think of me, I know. And I know that I can't really just go on apologizing, yet again cause that's the shit I literally always end up doing. All, I know what y'all are thinking, it's been forever! I'm so sorry, excuse, excuse, excuse. Well, lo and behold, this time is not the same! (kinda)

I almost began by saying the usual, "this semester was the hardest ladidadi blah blah" all so redundant, why do I feel like I begin the story-telling like that all the time? I guess it doesn't reaaally matter too much because of the accuracy but I've got to vary a little bit, y'know? *sigh* In any case, all those previous hard semesters can be taken out of the contending pool cause the semester I just drug myself out of shames the past couple of years, for sure.

The major difference between this year and all the others is just how much effort I put into cancelling many things out of my life ~for the most part, temporarily. I made an effort not to go to any parties, not that I was choosing, I completely said no. Limited my social gatherings, involvement.. I was totally not out here! The worst feeling is not reaching your goals when you feel like you sacrificed so much and compromised yourself. Nearing the end of the semester I just concluded I really could've been out here, just not caring at all, and have been in many of the same situations. It was discouraging and quite disheartening. I kind of felt at a stand-still with God. Not because everything was going wrong, I'm not that type of spiritual person. Y'know the type, only pray when things are going left and get mad if you don't just magically receive great things. My only request was to see what God wanted me to see, to just know why things felt all out of sorts. I don't think I have a direct answer yet but.. I'm feeling closer than before.

This semester was great in many ways, don't get me wrong. I learned a great deal and even though I've always felt quite mature, I think I also grew up a bit as well. I went to festivals, a few art shows here and there, met and connected with a rare, special few, furthered my art forms and creative depths... oh I even celebrated my 20th. It wasn't all tears. I certainly realized this blog is not something I need to sacrifice, in fact writing really heals and comforts me. I've written my whole life but I didn't think it would be a big deal pushing myself away, I never even considered it me not writing but of course, that's exactly what it was. And it felt quite toxic. Bottled up and desperate. 

Well, I'm not doing that again ~lol~ this is a real outlet. In actuality there are many things I'm not doing again. Going into the new year, I've bought a fresh journal and I'm really going to reflect and set things up for myself to make the best out of this upcoming year. I passionately feel like it is my year... While I'm doing that, enjoy some of the best of this semester.

xxoo missusmonroe

I decided to start this off with India, since I'll be heading to Bangalore in T-3 hours! I'm focusing on south of India, because India is such a rich and cultural diverse place that 1 post wouldn't do it justice. Even southern india is so big, but I'll try!

Whenever, I'm setting off to my next adventure, I always look for 3 main things. Food, clothing/customs, and people! This is true whether I'm prepping for a trip to Boston or Bangkok.

"The Kerala houseboats, or Kettuvallam, are famous for their unique, traditional, thatched roof design.  Although the houseboats vary in shape and design, they all share the basket-like roof, giving them the nick-name, basket boats. The name Kettuvallam comes from the Malayalam language, where “kettu” means “to tie” and “vallam” means boat. Traditionally, the Kettuvallam were used to ship goods like rice and spices and could hold up to 30 tons. These days however, the houseboats almost exclusively ferry tourists from all over India and abroad, through the narrow waterways of the Kerala backwaters."

Kerala, India

Ulsoor Lake (Bangalore)

Busy street in Bangalore